joyce

thank you for the music...

The Music I have listened since July, 2011

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub747pprmJ8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0g8wWOrvWgU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrIiLvg58SY&feature=share

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpA0l2WB86E&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOld6VsOVZc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7ry4cx6HfY&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRSH-egVyzk&feature=share

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQNrYdU5WcA&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBp8YxunvAo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRIbf6JqkNc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnfnSsWaHmI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAtUCeFJOvg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epSMyGjVsmE&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiXpJ0scofg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClTjOSMcVtA&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwDY8AiB8BM&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQQ6SfPZggw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7QL46cK7B8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUpbO-mpi74

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWnG5Ff0EWU&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YDHaZq7f_4&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiRqIqKw2Go&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExnUbFNcTQo&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_bqARauWZw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBhZAQlOtwg&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57tK6aQS_H0&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4L9-AvjsB6g&feature=fvst

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgOeGpwTTag&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9AeMN8Vi_U

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkch479CyLU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xda02V8KLzU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXq5VvYAI1Q

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIt8VTA-9Sc&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQoisuB5s7c

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9s25OUdspE&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IFy79x_4Hs&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGXVpFSE7nQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8tuTSi6Sck

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAJ2AoEwDvY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJdUV1ttxLE&sns=em

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXxbkaXw3ac

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xubavlo3CFk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXXXdf-a6LI&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avUXnAMpFoo&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPiZoND209U

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxUTe1lWY6s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROLGdmgxJ_I

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2skW43HNpE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqTZ7Bzp4N0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=-4sU4uxdg7s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9cgtWKI4TU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3fz8jcm-bV8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jyVZNrWkow&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bNE-5TVAmg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieq3rh67HW0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z8zBSZOi2fI&feature=related

http://soundcloud.com/mark-cottrell/joyce-is-not-here

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hX59v-gt-M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDXmL0eXnPs&sns=fb

http://www.mefeedia.com/watch/23810262

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PosYhfaWdKA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmubMVyuK4U

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ff7rybH51FU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrPxqCY4LHU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbL9vr4Q2LU&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5EUcYw96us&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLHTM0xQzmE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfduuHqDrfE&feature=related

http://reynoldsstill.blogspot.com/2011/04/good-times.html

http://reynoldsstill.blogspot.com/2011/01/workin-that-mojo.html?spref=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VBex8zbDRs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOfC9LfR3PI&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oni0tO_HN30&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hNZEjqXRFw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLtFsiOFn-4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8JryQXilMj4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vi8h9_KgFpc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48cTUnUtzx4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AY0BQwOMDLk&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IATz8ZVTALo&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtnUzvtZIq4&feature=youtube_gdata_player

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44YitKiVZ8E&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIiUqfxFttM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSNVCPkNl4U

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgmfldTRF6U&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbuQ22zVBvg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxHytCwb7bc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsBOxDM_Vek

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDLevsbqZkw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHEpuj96bCg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5yQ8JJ8R9E

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbJSVxKcUZs&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PYt2HlBuyI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPFwBhH53zs&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1woH96ROG-c&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vb9uyA8PTRU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrj_90X2TKw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4cSVnqGmOc&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VbEVfLOOb4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1ohegoq_IA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbP6TtDbszE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Amnpel6EpdU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-eHDXLr328A&feature=fvst

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzCFofR0wS8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fyi4Ylxmq3M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwvazMc5EfE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_E9Nu8JinM0&feature=fvst

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTZpOkgkkHs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Po6h3Z-wJvM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlIJr9DPRF8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkhl4vGPndg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bv_cEeDlop0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC9oQoFk9Rs&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8l37utZxMQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo4OnQpwjkc&sns=fb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=GB&hl=en-GB&v=Fc4qWs5jMlk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJm2qV34sU4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-DNzwV-M1M&feature=share

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PkB7MUT_0Dw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2s2tPORlW4&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tv7DY27aPyk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvVX-6zb5N8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qllwAR0FenE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7UZhorAki4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8n8bGzroeM&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPXFtPI2W_M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PP_apsbNev8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5rsc4GLrd0&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuYKOx834Pw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3LCyTtWhDA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUNyHPwPMfQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3uWMpfncAE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fd02pGJx0s0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGurZz-eQzQ&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLIN5m3gM7g&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2a2SS0zqmzk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fzab_LKC5v8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umq6qFNVnxs&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESOVrc4K3CQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUEhjIuz5n4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz16ngdsG0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogjV1nT5WW0

Writing things I don't know if I want to write... by Joyce Peng

< I wrote below the Chinese article earlier this morning, then my friend KW just now translated into English ... Writing connects people together ... Here's is his translation >

It's actually very late at 3:35am and any regular person should be resting.

I am yet to do so.

Because there is a hollowness beneath the chest that is refraining me from sleep. Even though I'm lying down.

Days are at its disorderly fashion. It could've been better If I saw Big Brother in Shanghai on 7th of August. There was a typhoon attack and it hit me like the ripples of a lake.

What's with this planet?

The planet is ill.

The planet became absurd and superficial. The only remaining ultimate aim is to use each other as instruments. Those tasteless and empty things they speak of had my expressions pale and fragile.

I am only nostalgic of the European travel days where unfamiliar tourists speak of the skies and the earth from philosophy, literature, music, theatre. Quality time became part of day without restraint. There were words of every root language where the wide skies met the seas. And then, we break apart with mutual respect, disappearing amongst the memories of itinerant rivers and lakes.

"Disappearing amongst the memories of itinerant rivers and lakes", are a combination of the world's most beautiful words used together. I am unable to imply the meaning of "rivers and lakes" to my non-Chinese speaking friends.

The unrestrained nature dashing with refined elegance. The unruly. The vast boundlessness. The aloof loneliness. Without alternatives or choice.

In this place, there are no emotions that can speak of the "disappearing memories of itinerant rivers and lakes". Nobody can simply erase one from its memories. Nobody is going anywhere. They mingle about and return with a bleak smile. And actually, "the body does not know how to treat its guest in a dream"….just part of the days' hedonistic greed.

In the past three months, I have been woken by fright when the morning is still at its youth. I stare at my phone in search of words and phrases from the shores. I became unsure and unable to find the difference between dreams and consciousness. My biological clock has been thoroughly thrown into confusion. Facial expressions becoming horrid and hateful in gaunt without an appetite and emotionally fluctuated.

But the world has no mercy on my fluctuation. With responsibilities pushing weight on my shoulders, there is no room to be slack other than the brief moments in the waters. I was allowed to spread my arms in emancipation and wander the ripples. I was able to reach out without constraint under a condition where you can no longer feel the body's weight, the pressure's weights and the weights of burden. You can only feel the float like the clouds on the surface of the waters. In the fine skies and clear waters and thin clouds with pure winds.

The weather has cooled down, winds bring the cold and air-conditioners switched off. Streets covered with people in long sleeves. I waved goodbye to the days near the ocean. How beautiful it was. I can stop next to the ocean by myself for a whole day to read, write, drink, dream. It's lonely without solitude. With the choice of living alone, there are no regrets.

This year will be a little station where I change trains to different tracks of my life's journey. I wave goodbye to my second marriage that was beautiful but with confusion. Sometimes, being stopped by the tracks is not a bad thing. To walk in an no access zone with difficulties should be  unforgiven.

We wave calm goodbyes without disappearing memories of itinerant rivers and lakes. Sharing the same pillows promises friendship for this lifetime. No matter whether the time were years or evenings…I emphasize affections but being confronted by reality, I can merely emphasize on meaning and not affection.

Therefore I say, this year was beautiful. You were beautiful for several years but who knew of such endings. The beauty in life is uncertainty and it is because you cannot simply recreate an identical experience. At the year's late evenings, there were times lingering between pillows, but things are not humane. Things move and planets orbit. In the deserted lengths, we've lost each other who are still hiding in the deserted lengths. But we've found ourselves.

I think I should be home. Home always offered a feeling where it is always blurred. This was probably because of fate encounters since childhood, living under a roof living family relations far too simple, family conditions far too turbulent and moving houses far too many times. Not only were they little streets turning into communities, eventually cities becoming nation states. 

That's why, I have always deemed that home is where the heart is. It's not where the house is or the privileges of living environment.

Where's the heart?
At this time, the heart is just here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVeFu_lf_-0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2m8vMtChcE

寫著不知道想寫的什麼…

其實已經很夜了, 3:35分,正常的人也要休息了.

我還不想.

心裡空空的.

不想睡, 睡也睡不著. 

 

日子過得雜亂, 卻並不無章. 若8月7日去了上海, 見到了大哥, 也許會好些. 那天打風, 就打亂了我一湖漣漪…

 

世界怎麼了?

世界病了.

世界變得那麼荒謬與膚淺, 人與人之間追求得不過是利用, 那些乏味的空洞話題, 把我也變得蒼白脆弱.

 

我,懷念我在歐洲遊歷的日子, 和陌生的同旅人談天說地, 哲學, 文學, 音樂, 戲劇…相聚一晌, 無拘無束, 用夾雜著法文,德文,義大利文,中文的英文,海闊天空一番, 然後分手,互道珍重, 相忘於江湖…

 

“相忘於江湖…”,是世界上最美麗的一句話. 我常常不知道,如何去對我的不識中文的外國朋友們解釋, “江湖”這個詞的涵義.

 

那是一份瀟灑, 一份不羈, 一份蒼茫, 一份孤獨, 一份無奈…

 

在這裡, 不會有“相忘於江湖…”那份情懷….大家誰也忘不了, 誰也走不了哪去…周旋一番後, 冰凍的微笑後, 竟然是”夢裡不知身是客”-----一晌貪歡!

 

在過去的3個月, 我每天都是在淩明驚醒, 看著電話, 搜索著來自彼岸的隻言片語…以至於我常常分不清, 什麼是夢, 什麼是醒…我的生物時鐘徹底被打亂. 容顏變得恐怖憔悴可憎…沒有胃口, 情緒起伏.

 

但世界容不得我的起伏, 重任於肩, 絲毫不可懈怠…便只有在水中的片刻, 使我自由馳騁, 蕩漾徜徉…那感覺如此自在, 舒展, 你感覺不到自己的重量, 壓力的重量, 擔子的重量, 你, 只感覺到漂浮, 如雲一般, 漂浮於水面…海晴天朗, 雲淡風清…

 

但天涼了, 風夾著寒意, 冷氣已經不用了, 街上的人們已經穿起了長袖衣….我, 就要告別大海的日子了….大海的日子, 何其美麗….我可以寂寞的停留在海旁, 一整天, 看書, 寫作, 喝酒, 做夢…是的, 寂寞, 並不孤獨…選擇寂寞的活著, 沒有遺憾.

 

今年, 將是我又一個人生獨旅的小小驛站. 我, 將告別我美麗而淒迷的第二次婚姻. 有時, 不能走下去, 不是壞事. 走不下去, 而偏偏要勉強走下去, 才不能寬恕.

 

我們, 是, 平靜的揮手, <老生常談般:不帶走一片雲彩,只有無數美麗記憶…>, 我們不會相忘於江湖. 同枕, 便是終生的朋友. 無論那同枕, 是一年, 兩年, 還是, 一夜, 兩夜….我重情, 可以不要現實; 重義, 可以不要情.

 

所以我說, 這一年是美麗的, 美麗的是你七,八年前, 怎麼也想不到, 會是如此結局, 人生美麗的就是”未知”…就是你永遠難以預見下一刻的發生…今夕此年, 曾枕上纏綿, 但物是人非, 物轉星移, 在荒袤中, 我們,失去了彼此, 亦在荒袤中;我們,找到了自己…..

 

我想,我應該是回家了….家, 給我的感覺, 一向是模糊的…這可能是緣自兒時, 太過簡單的家庭關係, 太過動盪的家庭環境, 太多次的搬家, 不僅是, 小街, 社區, 甚至是變換城市, 變換國家….

 

所以, 我一向認為, 心在哪, 家,就在哪. 而不是那所房子, 或優越的生活環境.

 

心,在哪?

心, 此刻, 就在這兒…..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2m8vMtChcE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVeFu_lf_-0

 

有一天, 有一個午後, 有一年

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gsekb1qwZs0&feature=related

我在早秋的昏黃

開始在清早醒來的空曠中

尋找你

那是無望的

因為, 你既不在, 也不曾在,

我溫濕枕畔 我夾雜著一些薰衣草味道的房間

你,從,不,在…

 

我會立即的問你---在哪?

你會立即的答我---在這!

 

但那是飛行15小時的距離, 那是黑暗與天明的對比!

 

現代通訊, 讓如此荒謬的一段距離,

因為互聯網, 而似是而非的安慰我

“我在這….”

 

於是, 我渾渾愕愕如此虛度華年

我在淩明醒, 醒了睡, 睡了醒的太陽升起的時日,

陷自己在那將混沌記憶裡

 

我不敢寫, 因為永遠未知那些結局, 即使我不強調結局…

 

呼吸哽噎, 澀於心頭

於眾人面前堅強的表面

卻在每一個黎明

流淚到漫山遍野…

 

我

沒有結局

死時

是否有那麼一束清新的野菊花?

在我的墓前

不羈的開放

驕傲的枯萎???

?